Where I'm Calling From

There are some real,hardcore bitches in my personal space. Women, and somtimes men who are working hard to display their displeasure with my work and the company I represent. I am only here to show you the product your boss purchased and how it works FOR YOU! One little, small, insignificant thing can get your eyes rolling, your guffaw going and you looking over your glasses at your co-workers for support and agreeance. I hope you never find that type of agreement from other people, because you alone are very small and myopic in your vision and thought. You have no idea how big this thing is in front to of you and where it can go, or take you. You can't wait for the next let-down. You're waiting to catch your breath to expel you're next complaint while the rest of the world passes you by. I Know, it sounds cliche', but it's true, You want to hold-up, stop the world so we can all hear your superior negative comments and get people on your side. "See...

You wanna talk about a collapsed bridge? Today, around 600pm, a bridge spanning the Mississippi River collapsed in Minneapolis. Several people were killed, many injured...a big mess. I think I've driven over that bridge when I took my family there last summer while I was working. My son Christian just about fell in love with the city, and has been asking to go back there ever since. I find him fascinating, his thoughts, desires, behavior and just his pure angelic handsomeness. I can look at the boy and see love, joy and crushing passion. He will grow to be a happy, inspired man one day. He fascinates me everyday and everytime his image enters my mind. I wonder if sooner or later he will ask about that bridge and still want to go back to Minneapolis. He's sensitive to catastrophes like that. Here's an instance of another bridge that has collapsed: the one between my mother and me. No one has died or has been injured. This bridge does span a large river as well, ...

This sucks! I'm sitting in the airport listening, against my will, to a traveling sale/serviceman proclaiming loudly to the southern-half of the the McAllen Intntl airport about this job and that job and this guy and that guy all while splayed across 3 seats because he's obese, loud and unreserved. He's happy about his loudness. I want so badly to reply to his conversation and jump-in wherever I can, but I don't have the balls to do it. My departure time in approaching and I don't think departure is happening as I watch the lightning and rain come-down to the sound of thunder. Meanwhile I'm tossing around the idea of going to into a marketing position with my company since my usual ideas about our software are so damn ahead of their time, yet so easy for our customers and applications trainers to grasp. But, no one's heard them yet, so I need to get into marketing. In fact I'm sending an email to a marketing contact I got today right now...brb...n...

Driving rhythm. If I was a driver, I would want to drive rhythm like Sonic Youth drives it. It’s like riding in a big Lincoln Continental, that big one, prolly 60’s model with the suicide doors. Going about 90mph is the rhythm and the vocal melodies and guitars being the shocks that smooth out the ride, so only by looking out the window to the side do you realize you’re going so fast. But if you close your eyes, you barely feel the road…maybe a slight bobbing motion. Today was weird. I felt like I had no sense of time and I have been in the air ALL DAY. I may have been, I don’t know. Maybe it was the multiple naps I took on my unusually long flight to Charlotte, NC. The bad weather in Charlotte started it the episode by not allowing us to land and leaving us to circle in the air as long as fuel would allow which turned out to be 30 minutes. Then, as we ran out of circling fuel we were diverted to Charleston, SC for refueling and to wait til the weather in Charlotte cleared. I...

Me without the iPod this week in San Angelo, TX. Me? Can you believe someone like me without their tunes? I can't and the radio is bad here. I didn't realize I would be in the heart of the freakin' bible belt. Literally the Christian music stations out-number the non-secular music station 2 to 1. And then there's the issue of the guy (and I mean guy, not Asian, or Korean or foreigner) that went balls-out nuts at Virginia Tech (no link necessary) this week. I can almost feel the animosity and since of righteousness here in the bible belt about the fact that this individual in NOT a white-God-fearing-Christian boy. I can hear the undertones in their voices, had the 'shooter' not been foreign the issue of race or nationality wouldn't even be mentioned. I honestly don't think you can change the minds of the Right. While I have to consciously NOT say Asian or Korean when I talk about the incidence(s) I still won't involve the guy's foreign origins. I ...

51 posts to make this fence that I surround myself in. I'm building a ranch that I can see the reflection of myself in . I want to look around at everything and see my confidence, however fabricated it is. I can fool myself that I know what I'm talking about sometimes. But there are also times that I am surprised by what comes out of my mouth. But I'll keep building my fence with these posts anyway. I synched my iPod's Podcasts with my new iMac and wiped-out all my loaded Podcasts on my iPod...no news and general info for this trip. I was left listening to the same 6740 songs I always have had, but then realized I was shuffling my albums, not my songs. Fixed that. I was between a fidgety, touchy old man who talked to himself and a young Asian lawyer, who told me where to go shopping in Los Gatos. At least we all weren't over-weight. This hotel doesn't have weights for working out, so no restarting the weight regimen this week. And Christian gets braces on his te...

Don't tell me not shop at the mall and buy your baby a shirt with a 'message' on it and then sell her soul on Myspace. page

My flickr page enjoy the Quebec photos

God’s breath is not new. It is the oldest wind to blow across this land we call home and away from home I can see how I will call myself to return to the womb I can’t remember. I can’t place the face of my mother in the time I was young. She is familiar, but not the same. I told Patsy today that the woman I see and call my mom today has no connection to the woman I grew up with as my mother. I know she looks the same, but the feelings are not there. That is why I don’t mind not calling her and checking on her. She feels familiar when I’m near her, but I’m not comfortable around her. I think I tried so hard to get out from under her, that I repressed something by accident. I don’t KNOW. For starters, Mew is calling me to a place I can only describe as familiar. I a place I fell in love with years ago. The tone of the voice is devastating. But then again I fall in love too easily. There are few thing sin this world I can conjure up in my head and produce tears (a few years ...

This stuff is heavy. It's brilliant and it sticks to the walls. It's like Chuck Liddell's loping right hand punch, it comes from a strange place now you're lying on the floor, maybe unconscious. The xylophone finishes the guitar's sentences in "It's All Around You". I haven't heard beauty like that since the first time I heard Bedhead. It's been a weird week: It started with reading a book titled Moonseed about an interstellar 'virus' that 'infects' Earth and destroys it from within. The 'virus' was brought here from a lunar mission by an astronaut nestled in a moon rock. Long story short, a life-sustaining atmosphere is created on the moon and all earthlings end-up living there. Then I get to my hotel room in West Virginia and find in an email that a training site has been added to my schedule for the end of the week in New Jersey...I only packed for 2 days and now I have to work for 4 days. My band also has a...

I learned hemorrhoids are caused by a blockage in the vein that drains the liver and rectum. This vein gets blood 'backed-up' and swells resulting in a pile in the anus. Liver blockages can be caused by too much spicy food. Spices from peppers (jalepeno, red, chili etc.). Some people are more sensitive to these spices than others. In my situation a perfect storm occurred that resulted in a very nice 'baby'. I was eating a lot of spicy foods and doing a variety of lower abdominal exercises. So, I dealt with this for about 2 days and the thing got bigger and very painful. It made me walk funny and and difficult to sit for any amount of time. I ate a lot of ibuprofen and took a sitz bath 3 times a day and after every bowel movement. This little nuisance was running my life. My schedule revolved around this 'problem'. The only thing I could say was thank God this all happened during an in-week and I didn't have to travel. Sitting on a plane and squi...

That's not a question that's a damn lifestyle. To quote the cheesiest Metallica lyric..."My lifestyle is determined by my deathstyle.". Or maybe that's reversed...anyway that's what I'm getting at...not only does drinking alcohol set my mind free, among other things, but it takes so much out of me and shortens my life-span. All dry, good-bye.

This is what I hear when I close my eyes… Broken Social Scene being cool and creative with their beats. I beat beat beat my heart out in and out. I wish I was here to be there to see me crawl around on all 2’s and 3’s. There’s a mystical connection here that we all can’t see but when we do we get scared because we’re too close to the truth about everything. I’m not afraid to talk about ‘big’ things and comment on the world living around me. Really, it sounds grand, but damn, don’t criticize me for speaking up about shit. I only feel sorry for you because you don’t express these things. Don’t think of me as a flake because I’m here doing this. I think its all flakey to say you don’t think about these things because you’re afraid to take –on what you don’t fully understand and stay safe in your highly structured, ordered world. It’s random bitch! Deal with it! Wine is good, but it makes you do stupid shit when nobody’s looking. Blank.

My wife and I took my dad and son to the local pizza buffet for lunch. No problem there right? Well, to be honest, this has happened before. We have been to the pizza buffet a couple times before, it's a good place to eat. Anyway, I get a couple slices from the buffet hotplate/counter, then my wife goes up to the counter while I grab some napkins and straws. I see her out of the corner of my eye and here and old voice say, "pardon me" and I turn to see the overweight sickeningly slob of an old man push his shit-filled Depends-wearing self in front of my wife with his grandchild. I put down my napkins and straws at the table and walk-up to the counter and in a purposely loud voice say, "Did that old man push in front of you?", my wife says, "Yes.". I believe my wife, she's a very honorable person. The elderly sack of shit prolly didn't hear me because he had 2 things on his mind: 1. Eating as much pizza he can thus filling his diaper w...

"I don't know what the freak, freak is happening… old-age, or older-age rather, but I'm ballooning. I won'’t disclose me my exact weight, but it'’s significantly more robust that it has been in the last eight years since I started low-carbing it. For no reason my middle is mui grande and I've been only slightly eating less low-carb lately. I think I may have ruined my body's ability to make use of the food I eat. Any amount of carbs, my body doesn'’t know what to do with it, and it immediately stores it as fat. This may be OK if I keep my carb-intake low for the rest of my life, but what about the long-term health implications? I hear I can ruin my kidneys of I keep eating so much protein etc. I'’ve pretty much written that one off because I think I would have seen signs of kidney trouble by now after 8 years of eating low-carb. But I guess those effects are latent and I wonÂ’t have viable kidneys when I'm 80 years old or something. Al...

It springs forth from below. I do not know where it comes from. Where is it? Where did it go? Who has it? Who really has it? Who posses it? Who really has it? Who can say they have it? Everyone is posing for it but we are all the same...we are all lame...we are all the same.

94.9 in London,ON is NOT a college station which is even better! It's your usual privately owned radio station that puts heavy emphasis on indie/cool/creative music. ROCK ON LONDON, ONTARIO!!!

~this is in Lincoln, NE~

I am back in Canada...in London to be exact. London is about 200km west of Toronto, the hot-bed of music right now. It's cool here literally, 80 degrees at home and 50 degrees here. It's cool here too, for another reason, they recycle everything, everywhere, even in the hotel room they have a recycle bin. The college radio station here, 94.9FM, plays great music and even the larger local station, 96FM, plays Metric. They ARE a local band, but still they're very indie and under the radar. I could live here, anywhere but Texas. The heat kills, the landscape bores etc. Anywhere, but here. This hotel has a kick-ass fitness room: 4 treadmills, 1 bad-ass elliptical, a weight machine, free-weights, 2 benches and 1 rowing machine (which looks like you have a be a kinetic physicist to work it). I have obviously skipped over the previous cities I've worked in like, Jackson, MI, Cumberland, MD (which actually was extremely beautiful being amidst the mountains of we...